Success!

Today I put on a pair of pants that use to be too tight for me...and they fit perfectly.
Success!
I have lost 9 lbs :D

Been too long!
Saturday my Mom and Dad have us over for dinner and it was delicious! I'm always down for some lasagna! It was nice to see Chris and Marissa-I do not see them enough!

I have been doing really good with my change of lifestyle as I like to call it. I have a new application for my Ipod called MyFitnessPal and I have to record everything I eat in there. So...every time I want to eat something bad I think twice because I do not want to enter it in! I have been doing some serious working out and I feel really good. Brad and I went for a 2 mile jog after I came home from work and it was awesome! We didn't stop once! :D

Tomorrow is my day off and I am excited! I always look forward to those days off! I'm going to do some cleaning and what not. Nothing too exciting but the day is mine!

I have been feeling kinda blah (besides feeling good about eating healthy) and I think it is because my body is adjusting to eating healthy?! I never realized how always would eat chocolate or something really yummy every time I felt bored or sad. Now I just have to push through the boredness!
Work is so boring to me and it is so hard. I am trying so hard to find a new job and I have been for quite a while now. I need some brain stimulation and I just can not take this retail garbage any more. I have no patience whatsoever and I am afraid that it is gone forever.

I can not wait because I know that one day I will find a new job and for a while I will be so happy to be the person that does not know anything! I want to learn something new and I do not want to ring up peoples groceries anymore! This was not the plan that I had for my self!

Oh well. Regardless of the 40 hours a week that I spend working (everyone has to do it!) I am still very content with my life:D

Happy Wednesday

Tomorrow is my day off! yay! I live for my days off (even if I am just going to be cleaning all day!).
Nothing really new-just been working, working out and eating healthy. I have been bored lately at work and starting to wander towards the candy but have been pretty darn good at resisting if I do say so myself!

I am thinking that I am going to weigh myself sometime next week but I am not too sure yet. I try not to think about how much I weigh and just try and focus on feeling good about myself. I often think when I step on the scale that the number should be lower and I do not want to have any discouragement this early in the game!

Excited for this weekend to have dinner at my parents house and see Chris and Marissa.
Also going to the Michigan Gold Expo with Brad. (He is super excited about that!)

I just cleaned my bathroom so I do not have to worry about cleaning that tomorrow since it is my least favorite!

Now I am just going to relax and read a book.
Night Night All!

Playin' hooky

Today I woke up and the idea of going to work did not sound appealing at all...so I played hooky. I have been thinking about using a sick day for a while now and today felt like the perfect day.
Yesterday I was off work so I went to breakfast with Amy, Target and then to visit my Mom:)

Last night Brad and I went to dinner with his cousin Abby (A) and her boyfriend Adam (A). We went to Bd's Mongolian BBQ. It was delicious! (and I managed to make it fairly healthy and didn't overeat! Although the few beers that I had didn't help but they were delicious too!)
Then we hung out at their apartment and Abby gave me a farm and cafe on facebook! :D

This morning Brad (B) and I went for a jog, about 30 minutes, and then did a bunch of ab workouts. Now I feel refreshed and ready to go! Its hard to run outside in the snow and ice but surprisingly refreshing. He had to push me because I have a hard time jogging for a long distance but in the end it was worth it! (Thanks B!)

I have been eating healthy all week and doing really good. I have not had a lot of sweets (even though I may think about them all the time:D) so last night when I had a bite it was sooooooo delicious!

Now Brad and I are going to go to Dick's sporting goods and I think I am going to buy a hula hoop! Supposed to be a good workout and they have special ones with weights for an even better work out!

That's about all I have for now!
Happy Saturday!

Another day...another couple dollars...

Another Tuesday come and another Tuesday (almost) gone.
Worked today and it was pretty lame. I did, however, eat healthy:) I have been eating pretty well for the past 2 days and it feels good!
I have been working out and that feels good! I am doing good so far and I am proud of myself!

It sure is hard to change the way I think.
Earlier I was trying to work out on my treadmill and after about 6 minutes it would stop and then I would have to reset it. After the 2ND time that it did this I was really frustrated (I was frustrated to begin with just because I have been all day) and immediately I thought "forget it I'm just going to go eat some cookies and Ill just try again tomorrow!" and then I caught myself! I called myself out, like hey girl, calm down!

I really do eat my emotions!
I know that sometimes at work when I am frustrated or even just really bored I would go and get something yummy from the bakery. That would make me smile for a minute but in the long run did me no good.
So now that I am paying closer attention to this behavior I think I am gaining better control over it.

I did give up on my treadmill for the time being but I didn't give up! I did some ab exercises with Brad (bless is patient soul! He just took my frustration in stride!) and I jogged with the Wii! I actually ended up getting about 30 minutes of exercise in and worked up a decent sweat! I jogged for 10 minutes straight, over a mile and I don't think I have done that since they made me run the mile in high school!

So in not giving up and working through my frustrations I accomplished what I wanted too! And now I feel good and I didn't eat any cookies!

I drank a few mugs of yogi healthy fasting tea to get me through the night!

All in All a good day (minus the 8 hours I had to spend at work!)

Stop And Smell The Roses

Another weekend comes to an end.
I love weekends even though I do not have your normal Monday thru Friday job. (Of course I love them even more when I don't have to work them!)
Pretty low key this weekend. Brad went snowboarding with the boys from school so I had the weekend to myself.

Friday I went to dinner with Julie from work and Saturday I had to work all night. Then I hung out and watched the raccoon outside with Stash and tried to be as excited as he was but I just couldn't do it!

Today I was off work so I cleaned up around my apartment and went to Barnes and Noble and wondered around for a while.
Brad came over after he got home and we watched Hitch (great movie...makes me laugh every time!) and ate some dinner.
Now its 10pm already and the weekend is gone:(

I just got off the dreadmill after a 50 minute fast walk:) And I feel great! I worked out yesterday morning too before work. Every time I work out I feel so great and refreshed and I know that I should do it more often.

I decided that I wanted to save the gorgeous roses that Brad bought me for Valentines Day so I am drying them out. They are hanging upside down in my dark, dry closet and then I am going to spray them with a sparkly shiny spray that I can buy at Micheal's. Then I can put them back in their vase and keep them forever! I love pretty flowers but I always feel so bad when I have to throw them away because they die.

Well that's about it for now!
As for my updates on me being healthy-I did not eat very well this weekend but I did get a lot of exercise. If only I could find my happy medium...Ill just keep working on that!
Until next time...

lets get serious

I have decided to take my blog in a different direction. From here on out I will be blogging about my struggles with my weight on a day to day basis. I am always thinking about my weight and how I wish this and I wish that and yet if nothing changes,nothing changes.

So damnit, I say lets get serious.

Its real simple. I want to be able to put on a bathing suit (or even a tank top for that matter) and be comfortable with myself. I want to be able try on jeans and not be close to tears because once again, they don't fit. I want to be able to wear a pair of shorts in the summer (and I mean a real pair of jean shorts) And that doesn't mean that I have to be a size 5. That just means that I have to be comfortable with my body.

I figure that if I blog about my struggles every day then I will be more likely to hold myself accountable for my eating behavior. Day after day I wake up and say "Hey! today is the day, I am going to eat healthy, I am going to work out!" and by the time the afternoon rolls around I figure I can just start again tomorrow.

So its time to put it all out there.

I know that I am beautiful inside and out but I am unhappy with my weight.
I am unhappy with my body.
I love to eat. I eat when I am bored, I am when I am sad, I eat to celebrate!
I strive for perfection and when I fail-there is no going back. And I justify it all.

I know that I have to change the way I look at all of this. I know that just because I eat a couple cookies or a piece of cake that does not mean that I should chow down on some pizza. I have a tendency to think that if I can not workout hardcore for 45 minutes then what's the point? I know that any exercise is good exercise.

So here and now, its time for a different outlook. I will do my best every day to eat healthier. I will do my best to get exercise-any exercise. And that will be my "perfection". And I will hold myself accountable for my eating and will not justify all the bad stuff that I am eating.
I will do my best and I will struggle, but I will succeed.

Because a year from now, I will wish I had started today.
So I am.